My Journal

6/16: When discussing health insurance, Nadia told me that Willy suggested that I should ask for a raise. I rejected the notion at first. But now come to think of it, I think it's despicable. Salary based on the worth of the employee, not on the pity on the employee. This is the hypocrisy of the East: Don't want friends to pity on the dinner table in a restaurant, but when it comes to salary, pity is almost a moral thing. I do learn a few thing, after trying to figure out how health benefits work since Nadia's losing hers and I need to add ours through my job. There are like 5 states (NJ is one of them and Vermont doesn't really count-no penalty) that are still making this mandatory after the abolishment of mandatory health insurance (ACA/Obama Care) at federal level in 2019. There's some site showing how health penalty is calculated in NJ.

Love the last remark: That's what happens when you order a president through the mail

Last week (6/10), we installed 86" LG TV to the wall mount. I am still worry because the studs didn't feel strong when I drilled. Today I think the top part of the mount came off about 1-3mm from the way. More on the left side. I need to keep monitoring this because when necessary, I would need to take off the TV with Willy's help, and install these TOGGLER SNAPTOGGLE Drywall Anchors (about $8 on Amazon for 4), which is said to hold more than 150lbs quite well, on dry wall alone.

Not thoroughly, but I skimmed through the recordings of the 2022 Center for Missions and Evangelism Conference Mid-America Reformed Seminary. This is suppose to deal with missions with other cultures (or races if they don't forbid). However, I find it rather shallow. To think I almost bought a ticket just to fly down to Florida for that. This is more or less an OPC/PCA held event. They had the rapper/pastor Timothy Brindle to be one of their guests, to me, he's the only one I know of. I wish they would just do more evangelism, then maybe they know what to say better on the stage rather than quote textbooks.

Last Sunday (6/12) I finally got the chance to speak to the pastor about my intention to do evangelical works in the neighborhood of Bridgewater. Pastor then revealed to me, contrary to what I thought (based on what I hear from him over time), that he had tried reaching out the church surrounding area before but it had fallen on deaf ears. I do not hold pastors to be preachers in this sense, though one must try all offices like Paul. So, I shall pray to God on this. So far there's only one (E.) eager to join, and we shall see after planning and strategizing. We have a good church here, finally, with a pastor though not well known nor as old as many would have wanted, but exceeds those others who would be more desired qualitatively. May God have mercy upon me and my walk in Him. So this work as the pastor implied, would not be part of the church, which is just the way I had expected.

On Statement 11: Friendship of the Ad Interim on sexuality by PCA, I was reminded of YMCA, how I once worked there where GRIOT was, in Brooklyn YWCA. YMCA was supposed to be a Christian organization, but in America, that is anything but. So I wondered about the history of it, how from Sir George William, a philanthropist founding YMCA, chiefly focusing on cultural mandate for men in the industrial revolution, to the going off rail of the center today. I believe when Christian organizations began to focus on $ and large administration/executives, things often don't look too good.

This also recalls BSF, which was founded by Audrey Wetherell Johnson, a British missionary of the China Inland Mission. I did a quick brief search but nothing much can be discovered on how it operates, its financial accountability, etc. At least not online. It's hard to say for me for now, but having rotating lay teaching or questionnaires on one's opinions/feelings for Biblical discussions are a few methods that do not conform to biblical teaching, as minor an issue as they maybe. However, BSF/online, despite their methodology and concealed administration, has like Redeemer PCA of NY, opened a flood of opportunities for people to do Bible study outside the bounds of their local churches, especially when their own churches do not love God enough to do so.

In Sunday School, finishing the Ad Interim report, I find myself having different (or what maybe slightly different) views:
- David's theology on not harming God's anointed (Saul) - pastor's take seem to be just about not sneaking up on Saul but rather to kill Saul in direct battle. I wonder if he would interpret anything into "touch not God's anointed". But this is not new, many American pastors in the conservative arena, perhaps because of many fallen preachers, do not take much care of that phrase.
- Among the audience. There was a slight argument on David's many wives (by T) vs. killing someone to get Bathsheba (by F). I would say F is wrong, David killed to not get Bathsheba, because he already got Bathsheba, he killed to cover it up.
- I find Statement #11: Friendship of the Ad Interim report to be insufficient when dealing with singleness biblically. There needs to be more biblical view on singlehood in fellowship with others, which begs the question in Matthew 19:10. Today we see many desires singleness in churches out of selfish/feminist desires.
- Pastor critiqued social media today for unkind words used, slanders, etc. rather than sharing one's own life's blessings. I view social media only as an informative media, a way to keep in touch with people, even long lost friends. I don't view it as a media to share life's story, for that I prefer face to face talking. As for arguments, I view it as a training media, to improve my eloquence, deduction, analysis of men, though I do my best not to demonize my opponents.
- On capital punishment - Pastor believes in a large body consented agreement before killing in capital punishment can be carried out. I believe one just has to follow his own conviction before the Lord. Perhaps because I was never under the modern Roman Catholics' influence on their view of life. But vengeance is still the Lord's, so I believe we can look at Dietrich Bonhoeffer as example, in spite of his failure to kill Hitler. It would be interesting to see pastor's take on Bonhoeffer in this matter. If it must be a large body decision, how large? 10 people? 20?
- Accountability: It's good to have others to be accountable to, to each other in the family of God. However, I do not follow the modern American Christians' way where this is a must. I think first and foremost, God is sufficient. The rest should be a natural thing that follows God, so there is really no need to even touch on that. The only verses on the Bible they would cite are not what they meant. These are verses simply on fellowship and love. It's not about finding someone to hold oneself accountable for in life.

On the Sermon on adultery, Genesis 3:16 is mentioned: Pastor's take on the curse = women's bad desire, men's bad ruling.

On Exodus 20:13 - You Shall Not Murder.

Pastor Chris noted the difference of Murder and Kill. But not extensively.

On Purpose of Life - Basile's mention of theology in everything we do, is rather comforting, very reformed, I recalled asking Phil a few weeks before during our buffet fellowship meal when he confessed his mal-managed eating habit, that if his diet was not reformed. To which he answered: His diet is liberal, but his theology is reformed, as a defense I suppose.

When touching on Murder in the heart - Basile connected foul language to a murderous heart. [Judging from how biblical saints used strong language, I think this would depend: i.e. holy anger vs. sinful anger. Though we strive to not darken our heart with such cuss words, but hate can be used rightly, just not on what God calls good]. But Matthew 12:36 is crucial, for we must give account for every careless word we speak.

Then we had a missionary John and Aruna Desai (local, ISI ministry for international students) the church support visiting and took over the Sunday School sharing their work. I was willing to test him on the knowledge of Stephen Tong, which he knew, though I later realized that the Isabel Tong he thought was Stephen Tong's daughter, was actually one of Tong's brother, Caleb Tong's (whom I believe was recently deceased) daughter, who studied at WTS choir in 1992.

Desai's ministry in Princeton was certainly remarkable, as they shared the Gospel (I assumed) with many through the giveaway (giving free stuff, furniture to international students at Princeton) program. The Desais' home church is MEFC.org under the evangelical free church denomination, which I don't know much about. Though my later chat with John the next Thursday led me to believe that he is more or less Arminian (perhaps due to his Methodist background) and leaning towards Charismatics. His only problem if not only view of Charismatics' characteristics is their speaking in tongue. Yet he would take tongue speaking mysterious enough to be real sometimes, due to the verse in 1 Corinthians 14:39, John confessed that he would not interfere those who speak in tongue, in spite of the fact that he may also have problem with it. He gave us two free books in church, I plan to skim through them quickly and do away with them as first, I don't have enough library room for them.

I believe this rekindled my spirit towards evangelism once again, though as disturbing as like many OPC and fundamentalists' view on evangelism, Pastor Chris' view on this isn't encouraging as well. From this last Thursday's Bible Study on John 15, he challenged that there is no relation between fruit and evangelism. Though he was right that the converts of evangelism are no way the prove of our obedience to God, but he would be wrong that evangelism is not commanded by the Lord to all people around us, not just to people whom we try to make friends or get to know first. This is not to deny God's special calling, but Gospel centeredness is key. I pray that by the example I could be, I am abiding in God's will, in His fear. I believe I can still proceed with this church and pastor because he admitted where he stands, even though I have yet to engage in serious conversation with him on this issue. At the very least, he should agree that he has no problem with me doing evangelism by sending people to this church, people who are no more strangers to me than they are to him.

But on Evangelism, I must beware. For it is not I. Not for number. Yes to the small number of church members, though this is a passive motivation of course, one that is a positive reaction towards a negative condition but not the reason of it, nonetheless. For we must not do evangelism to just increase numbers. The true fruit is in the refined and sanctified WORK of evangelism. The harvest (various passages in the Bible touched on this) of converts are fruits (hence it would have been my answer to Pastor Chris' Thursday question on are there any fruits referring to converts, but I stayed silence, perhaps due to distractions). But the fundamentalists and their fundamentalist rebels (who still remained somewhat fundamentalists) would not be able to consider the fruits of such labor do not always refer to direct converts.

I believe the Desais are truly faithful in evangelism despite our doctrinal differences. And that Pastor Chris' is not anti-Gospel centered at heart despite his fundamentalist influence. I pray God grants me the right heart in my work towards evangelism, that His glory maybe seen and learned by others, including the Desais (towards Reformed doctrine) and Chris (towards a more Gospel Centered - evangelistic heart) in the same manner which I firmly hold under His grace. Amen.