I made a naive mistake of telling people my calling, my vision. Not that things must be kept secret from people, but there are those who are not worthy and there are those who are. As Jesus said: Give not holy things unto to dogs, cast not pearls before swine... (Matthew 7:6)
It was because when I measure people according to my own standard and emotion, and not God's, that I failed to discern between dogs and saints.
I attended yet another retreat last weekend, a great one, the speaker was Rev. Stephen Chan. There's one thing he said I agree very much: That many of these college fellowships are more like youth groups.
This was actually why when I was in Stony Brook, I have emphasized to them that student ministry (there) was never my vision. I supposed if they have any mature discernment, they should know why without me telling.
I was asked by these "little children" why I do not seek after churches' support in my calling, my vision, ministry. I didn't tell them because the reason was in my heart, not my head. But now it has borne fruitful words: That it is not that I do not want help or support, but because I cannot find one. Many church leaders here are excellent practitioners in telling one thing before one's face and another thing behind one's back.