American Citizenship

It is certain that I'll leave this country. Only because I have no reason to stay. God has shown me what I needed to see. Things that I don't need to come to America to see. But I came anyway, yet God showed me still, because of His mercy upon me.

If I stay, whatever I do, even God's work, would only make me a entrepreneurial businessman, a successful one, happy, surrounded by caring and loving family. Businessman? Never was my dream. Surrounded by happy family? Yes. I wanted a researcher's life too. A scientist, with a love and caring family. A christian one. In fact, I wanted to do everything that came to mind, in addition to anything God has commanded me since youth. "No one can do everything, no one can learn everything", my father once warned me when I was perhaps under 10. I was so eager to learn and gain the source of everything that I failed to see my own pride. I wanted all knowledge, not money, but the knowledge and power of obtaining money. I never had interest in money, only the interest of having anything I need at a snap of my fingers. The phrase "Knowledge is Power" had sunken me into oblivion with pride. My mother had once given me to God since my birth. What lies ahead I do not know. But I have come this far under His grace, how could I resist? There are enough of His servants here and they like it here. Many still will come. My calling has been to those who dare not preach. Even since I was young. I have no pride in this, for I am neither looking for a highway suicide. But perhaps the path that God lays ahead for me is something far worse than a suicide mission, yet such cross will be my glory, forever and ever.

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