I realized lately I have been having trouble controlling my time. Not able to be punctual at meetings and work, mostly due to making too many vain promises: It appears that I love to make promises but not keep them when the time comes, not that I like to break promises but I tend to devalue the promises I make during the last minute when all other things have been pushed to as well. And of course subsequently, procrastination: A habit that appears to be too hard for me to defeat
Nonetheless, it doesn't mean that I should give up. I must fight this. I remember there was a film "Clockwise" which I watched very very long time ago that might attribute to my unpunctual behavior, yet it does not take all the blame, for I am also one to be easily obsessed with things.
Remedy:
1. To realize that in order to be punctual, I have to accept the fact that I have to be earlier than promised. Perhaps the problem is "how early", then a good motto I should follow is "It's better to be early than to be on time".
2. To Value my time. Sometimes, convenience is better to be sacrificed for the sake of time. For example, everytime after church worship, I have to rush things, so I could fit into the schedules those whom I'm taking a ride home from, the alternative was that I walk to the train station myself. This had been one reason I did not want to be deacon and was planning to leave this church. If I decided to walk, then I have enough time to do my task responsibly and efficiently as the newly apppointed "librarian" of my church whose library needs serious reformation. But then, I'm sure many will feel that I am being too stressful and not let me walk myself. Now, if that is the case, if they truly willing to spare their time waiting to give me a ride home after I've finished my work organizing the library and other things I felt the church has constantly lacking after worship, then I'll gladly comply. However, I must be sensitive enough to tell of their true intention, that their intention is not out of pitty. For taking a train has always been better than getting a ride in a car: I have time to read and rest without interruptions. It is only to places where public transportations cannot reach that presents an issue. But for the better of our church, for my responsibility as a deacon, for the Glory of God shining forth from this church, I'm willing to sacrifice this. I am actually saving time this way, or rather, I won't be wasting time this way.
3. Truly apologize for being late, and show that I will never repeat it again.
4. Don't forget quantity. Sometimes I value quality so much that I use it as an excuse to deny the credibility of quantity, while still believing that quality is greater than quantity for quality is the source of GOOD quantity. If I deny quantity, I create a paradox I cannot solve.
5. Acknowledge that there are some promises I cannot make, otherwise people will not only take advantage of it, they will also devalue it. While it may be enjoying to reject promises, I must also be aware that this is perhaps the hardest point to keep. For if I initiate a habit of ignoring all favors and promise-making, I will definitely fall into selfishness, being a hypocrite acting as if I always keep my promises while faking the integrity of the few promises I make, making the promises truly vain indeed.
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