My Journal

On President Biden, Ben Shapiro's take on Biden's first Press Conference is funny. Trump was vile, but Biden has gone literally senile, and that's not to say he's actually just stupid. It's obvious that many voted for him because they just couldn't stand Trump's uncouth behavior. They do it because they are liberal and young and proud, which aligns with today's American (or rather Western) education system. Biden is well-known to brain freeze during his speech, perhaps that's why he's reluctant to come out in public. Despite encouraging bipartisan cooperation prior to his election, now he would bash the Republicans whenever chance he gets.

First, everyone's afraid that he'll die on us before his first term ended, because he's just so senile, and that Kamala would take over, Alamak! I highly doubt he'll get reelected, and the opposing parties (What's Trump's new party going to be? or is it just a new social media app?) would have such a big fat chance to beat the Democrats the next time that it would definitely have to be election fraud for real if the next presidential victor goes to Democrats again.

On Church, seeing some postings on Facebook and listening to Pak Tong's sermons brought me to reflect on various things. Memories. Wondering where everyone has been. Those actively leading youth fellowships tend to become taciturn now. Yes, they have their own families and children, but still, it does not extrapolate rightly. Extrapolating backwards only show that something's wrong. That their desire to lead, to be active in their youth has ulterior motive. They would deny it for sure, but the numbers don't lie, they are not what they were. This is not even touching on the subject of unconverted ministry.

But of course, many church leaders/pastors these days are no different. They may very well be the progenitors of these goats. Unconverted ministry aside, it's like becoming a pastor was so hard that once the position is obtained, they have no more energy to do more. Loosing their first love, so to speak. If they do not watch themselves, they would mutate their theology thinking that no one would find out because they believe they are smart enough to hold theology A and not A at the same time. Recalling Rev. Laura Lin of CCCNY. Our last conversation was that I told her I cannot in my good conscience be associated with her nor her church.

To think that she actually thought I needed her church to climb in some "ranks". I think that's probably most Western influenced Christians are. They treat Christendom as some Caste System. Pastors are respected because they have gone through great deals, not because they are anointed by God. The case with Michael Liu was definitely a clear red flag against Laura. Seeing her pushing Michael away was like when you thought you've won the lottery and you wipe your arse with the ticket, treating it like garbage. Her despise of Michael in an unChristian way became obvious when she tried to discourage me to get close to Michael by telling me how if Michael graduated first from seminary he would be my teacher. Do you go to school because you want to learn or because you want climb the ladder of fame and pride? Why couldn't she show the faintest love to Michael, I don't know. Perhaps we'll see when God puts them as roommates in heaven, if, either of them would end up there. All I know is, the signs were enough for me to leave her church. There had been many, such as having an elder who's universalist (why that's just plain heresy already), justifying white lies, not gospel-centered (in fact, hating gospel-centeredness - because she claimed there can be no pleasure in serving God, Rev. Laura Lin actually CLAIMED IT SO!!! Boy what sorrowful reward system she must be holding on to). God may very well be moving his lamp from this church, her sorrows shall be multiplied that hasten after another god, her drink offerings of blood will I not offer, nor take up her name into my lips...Psalm 16:4

Rev. Lin wasn't the only one I recall. There were others, the bullies in Stony Brook. Bullies of pastors, basically. They may deny it, but it is what it is. When I stood strong against such behavior, many turned away silently, why? Because bullies don't care to cast the first stones. They continue to hold grudges, they chose to be indifferent, they reveal the nature of their true fellowship - the fellowship of men, not of God. The fellowship of you scratch me I scratch you. When they praise God, what they praise is not God, for they do not know how to be joyful IN GOD. They are joyful, they invoke God's name in their joy, but they are joyful in themselves using God's name, perhaps not carefully breaking the 3rd commandment. To be joyful in God, to praise God's name, is not: Oh God, I thank you, I praise you, for I have 10 As!!! I have such great...That's the Pharisee's prayer/praise. Indeed, history repeats. True joy in the name of God is found in the joy when other sees your ACTION, they would know they MUST praise God themselves if they love the Lord! And they know, you are an active agent of God. They may or may not be converted, but they know the praise at the very least. I say they may not be converted, because I've experienced such folks. Thought they were converted, but they actually were not. Perhaps yet to be.

I shall pray for them. Pray for myself to discern such and destroy such wickedness with such a blow that severe their souls into million pieces, but in a Godly manner, that seek God's mercy always in lightening my eyes before His straight path, so that I have room to forgive even such folks.